Googly

Question: How to stop someone who is blabbering about Cricket?
Real Question: Ask him the difference between Googly and Wrong'un?

PS:
Another Question after Real Question: After how many mandatory overs,a ball change in due in a Test Match?
One more: What is Chanderpaul is applying under his eyes while batting? Why not fielding?

MOTORCYCLE DIARIES 3.0

            It was precisely 30^th Dec 2011. All the chosen ones decided to galore at my flat. Then we gonna hit the road for New Year. So my OGF(Old Good Friend) Pramod , proposed to take his car. Which was at his home. So the task was cut to me and him to bring car back to the city. ( Time: 7.45 PM) . His house was ( according to him ) was just 20 mins away from my flat.

                        Time: 9PM- We left on him bike to his home. And here the journey starts.

I remember watching MOTORCYCLE DIARIES which is a doc on Che. They way Che and his doctor friend roam around the world on his cruiser bike was simply breathtaking. The speed, rowdy techniques, sudden breaks, unexpected speedbreakers, occasional off the track ride …all was there. I wished to be there simply.

            The wish came true that particular day.

Time:- 9:15 Pamya warned me there is bumpy road ahead and it is a very small patch. I said, “ fine!”  Later it turned out I misheard something. The road was typical country road. It was pitch black. As if we were riding on moon surface. Speedometer was fluctuating between 60 – 65 KM/PH. At the beginning My heart was pounding very fast. Though I was wearing helmet, everything was unsure, simply because Pramod was driving. [Nightfox:- I will simply jump in front of the truck, but never be pillion to Pramod. Lolz].

So that was his reputation. But he hold his own. After few minutes I started enjoying. Every other second I was speculating we gonna slip. We we wont, there was a momentary ( 2 seconds) relief . It was exactly like computer game.

PS: I am getting bored , I am gonna wrap up here…

कंटाळा

DATA DULL.OFFICE_BOREDOM;  SETDULL.UNINTERESETING;
    IF STATUS="BOREDOM"
    THEN DO;
    ACTION = "YAWN";
    END;

    ELSE IF STATUS = "HIGH_BOREDOM"
    THEN DO;
    ACTION=" YAWN UNTIL YOUR NEIGHBOUR STARTS YAWING, THEN YOU WILL HAVE A COMPANY";
    END;

    ELSE IF STATUS= "ULTRA_HIGH_BOREDOM"
    THEN DO;
    ACTION = " CHANGE YOUR SCREEN-SAVER TO REVOLVING OBJECTS LIKE MOVING FISH, FLYING BIRDS..AND
               STARE AT THEM.";
    END;

    ELSE IF STATUS= "LOW_ALTITUDE_BOREDOM"
    THEN DO;
    ACTION = "OBSERVE YOUR FINGERS,( ONLY HANDS). CLOSELY MONITOR THE NAIL SIZE OF EACH FINGER.
    SEE WHETHER IT IS LEPTOKURTIC OR MESOKURTIC.[ DONT ASK WHY NOT PLATYKURTIC!!!]
    IN BETWEEN YOU CAN SCRATCH YOUR HEAD";
    END;

    ELSE IF STATUS= " HIGH_ALTITUTE_LATERAL_BOREDOM"
    THEN DO;
    ACTION = "SEARCH FOR THE ALTERNATE MARATHI WORD FOR MALE MASHI.[GAVAKADIL HOTELAT FAR ASATAT MASHYAA]";
    END;

RUN; [AT YOUR OWN RISK]

PS- BOREDOM, BOREDOM , BOREDOM
    I AM FEELING AWESOME
    IT JUST REMINDS ME ,
    MY INTELLECTUAL FREEDOM.(?)
    MA THOUGHTS ARE RANDOM,
    I AM REVOLVING IN A LAZY KINGDOM...
    IF YOU READ THIS,
    YOU WILL LOSE ALL YOUR WISDOM....
    BOREDOM , BOREDOM, BOREDOM..............

मन माझे आभाळ

मन माझे आभाळ ,
मन माझे आभाळ 
डोळ्यात तुझ्या शोधसे
डोळ्यात तुझ्या शोधसे
माझ्या श्वासाचे कवडसे
माझ्या श्वासाचे कवडसे
मन माझे आभाळ ,
मन माझे आभाळ ...

PS:  Last 10 mins i was thinking about what to write in PS...

विषण्णता

खोल खोल रुतत जाणारी अस्वस्थता,
अश्वत्थांम्यालाही हेवा वाटावा

उसविलेल्या सदऱ्याचीही फिकीर नाही ,
उद्विग्न मनोकल्लोलात वाटे क्षुद्र सर्वकाही

विझलेल्या विस्तवासारखी प्रतिभा ,
मुर्दाड स्थितीतली स्थितःप्रज्ञता

थिजलेला आत्मसन्मान ,
अंधकारमय स्वप्ने अन काळा सूर्य...

P S :  This one is dedicated to kavi Grace. Almost a year ago i wrote this poem.
          Today, i relived those moments while typing these words. Simply Hypnotic!!!

गुंजारव

भ्रमराने करावी आर्जवे कुसुमाला,

कर रिती थोडी तुझी मधुशाला ! 

पण ती रसिका 

लाथाडीतसे सर्व आवेदने 

न जाणो कोण्या मस्तीत दंग 

असते करण्या प्रकाशाशी संग..

का झुरावे मग भ्रमराने?

का धाव घ्यावी कुसुमाकडे आवेगाने?

त्या वेड्यास काय ठाव ?

रविकिरणापुढे  त्यास काय भाव ?  

बसतो आस लावून,

पाहिलं एकदातरी मजकडे, 

पण ती स्वतातच असते रममाण 

करते वायूशी गुजगोष्टी तर कधी आकाशाशी नेत्रपल्लवी !

होते कल्पनेच्या अश्वावर स्वार 

करते स्वर्गविहार,

भ्रमरालाही हौस भारी 

पण नाही परवडत ही सवारी.

झाले जड नयन जरी 

आले जरी अंधारून तरी 

आस त्याला मोठी भारी 

येईल साद कधीतरी...

 

होतात तिन्हीसांजा 

पाखरे जातात आपल्या घरा

सुरज जाई दुसऱ्या गावा

वाराही झोपी जावा 

वाटे तिला अनंत एकांत 

पडते मग भविष्याची भ्रांत 

येते मग आठवण भ्रमराची त्या निष्ठुर  हृदयाला ,

देती साद त्याला , घे शोषून मजला 

किंतु  त्याने आता गुंडालीला असतो आपुला गाशा 

हाती असते रिते मधुकुंभ व साथी असते फक्त निराशा...

Ticket Please!!!

The excitement of early job days is vanishing as quickly as Indian bowler’s fitness, because of single TICKET Issue.

Whatever may be the work, be it big to minuscule you got to raise a ticket.

These includes -

Telephone line,

Drawer,

System configuration,

Folder Access,

Notepad,

Brokerage

            The other day, a guy sitting behind me, asked to an IT guy (who was standing right in front of him) to raise some query on behalf of him.

IT guy: - Sir, you required to raise a ticket in IT helpdesk. In the subcategory-

IT real time assistance.  :)

            For registering query, you need an ITHD login id. For that also you need to raise a query.

 Even for a bottle of water, office boy asked me to raise a call to pantry.

My favorite pastime is to play a game called match the following.

Issue                           Department

Drawer                         IT

Telephone                    Admin

Login ID                       HR

Brokerage                    IT

Insurance                      IT

I-Card                          Admin

Folder Access              HR

                                                [Reply me the correct matches. :)]

NO IF , NO BUT

ONLY TICKUT !!!